How to put the game in accordance with everyday life

I had a pretty bad problem with it when I was younger too. It eventually just boiled down to the fact that I needed to do what I needed to do. And when my life fell apart from not doing what I need to do, it was a wake-up call. So I started doing what I need to do, and it's been alright ever since. I took some time away from maple when I was having to work a full time job and go to college at the same time, but now that those two years are over, life is good now.
The thing that keeps me from over-playing is that if I go back to playing 16-18 hours a day, I will lose my career, my home, my everything.
Some people are here because they don't have to do anything else, and play every waking minute. And I can actually respect that. If they have no obligations, then all the power to them. Honestly, I would too because for some reason, I find THAT much enjoyment in this game. And it's scary to think that, but "different strokes for different folks", ya know?
There are many situations that either justify time spent on here or nullify.
Kat for example, is a stay-at-home milf. My stay at home milf. She has a perfect example of a good reason to play this. She has to be home ALOT for her kids and take care of them, and she has to play this because her kids drive her batshit crazy. If I had kids, I would too!
Some people are here while working 60+ hours a week, and play every minute that they aren't at work or sleeping. That was me until very recently when I was forced to transition jobs. At the moment, I'm working a temporary job about 40 hours a week until next year, when I go back to my old job. But when I'm not at work or taking care of other minor life stuff, I'm on here. No matter what. And even that does damage. I have less relationship with my family and friends.
Some people are here when they shouldn't be. On the edge of being kicked out of their homes, losing their jobs, burning bridges just to level up. That was me until it finally happened and I had to get my life together.
Different situations for everyone. Some people even play this at work, just because they can.
It's simply a matter of having the power to realize when enough is enough.
As far as actually trying to stop the addiction.....
I have not tried. At all. I don't want to. I have recently began quitting cigarettes, because I want to. But I don't want to quit this game, and I won't want to unless.... well, I can't think of any reasons. Even when I took a two year break from Maple, I still logged in to the server that I was on here and there to say hello and grind for a couple of house, vote, etc. I knew the whole time that as soon as I was done with my degree, I would come straight back to gaming. And I did. And I don't think I'm going anywhere either.

Also- Tenderly your threads are wonderful. No need to apologize for anything about them.

 

Spoiler: My Experience w/ MS Addiction

This thread is the story of my life. I used MapleStory as my main outlet in tough times during my teenage years through my first few years of college. I was dealing with some major psychological issues at the time and I didn't have effective coping mechanisms. Flaws in my personality (obsession, perfectionism, impulsiveness, etc.) ended up being a perfect recipe for a disastrous addiction to this game. In those days I wasted thousands of dollars and hours trying to create a perfect life inside of MapleStory in attempt to run away from painful reality.

To be completely honest, I needed professional help and I did not have the skills or the foresight to change my behavior at that time. I've grown up a lot and while I don't regret the time I've spent with this game, I do regret the money blown and relationships lost more than anything else.

Now I try to see this game as just another hobby and I have to work diligently to keep the addiction in check. I'm not always good at this. I tend to quit cold turkey now and then for weeks or months at a time when the stress hits the fan. Right now my goal is to reward myself with play time after I've done a sufficient amount of work. I'd like to play ~1 hour max on weekdays and as much as I want on weekends without compromising my health or responsibilities. I think I spend too much time on the forums... but I haven't figured out how to address that yet.

The truth is that some people just have more on their plate than others. I used to be the kind of person that could no-life and play all day every day, but eventually I found out that this really isn't the life I want to lead. I was really unhealthy and miserable. I am highly motivated to achieve success in other aspects of life and too much gaming gets in the way of those goals. I'm sometimes envious of how relaxed and carefree other people are... but I know down the road I want something different.

*If you are interested I'd like to be buddies in game. I've been looking for friends who seek a more balanced life because I think they will be more understanding of my situation. We can also encourage each other when the addiction is getting too strong. My IGN is Kitty.

 

All games are dangerous and all games have the potential to make you addicted. Please everyone, be careful.

 

I'm really glad we are seeing this kind of discussion so early on into this server's life.

A few points I'd like to add:

Whenever this topic comes up, people tend to focus on the very obvious dangers of game addiction: poor performance at school/work, lacking social life, lacking love life, etc. However, in my personal experience, I've found the effects to be much more subtle and as a result go unnoticed for way too long. I have definitely experienced very real addiction to this game, but from an outside perspective I was on top of all my shit. Good grades, social life, love life - so it was easy for me to justify spending absurd hours playing. But as time went on, I came to realize that I had lost sight of ALL my other interests and long term goals. In a way, I felt as though I had lost a piece of myself. But there was never a sudden moment where it was obvious that I was addicted, because the "important" things were still in place. I'm rambling but my point is that the MOST important things in your life are not your grades, having friends, and being in love. Even more important than all of this, is your understanding of who you are, what you stand for, and what you want for your future -- and for me, this is what gaming addiction made me lose sight of.

I have a LOT more thoughts on this but will return later. Love you all

 

Joke's on you, I had bad grades before I was addicted to games.

 

If someone has the capacity to get addicted, they will get addicted to anything. Singling out Maple, or video games in general, is not fair. A person with an addictive personality seeks to completely lose themselves in something outside of them so that they do not have to face reality... people can end up as social addicts or work addicts but few will say that anything is wrong with those, why? It's the same idea, a person perpetually running away from the pain.

 

I don't think you understand how addiction works. There is no such thing as an "addictive personality."

 

I would say that a person who finds themselves in the midst of it understands it better than someone who is using textbooks, granted that they have sufficient self-awareness about what is occurring. I am referring to someone that repeatedly fails to establish balance and often loses themselves in one particular thing while neglecting the rest of their lives. What would you define as personality?

 

That is called having low levels of self-control and self-discipline, something which I, too, suffered from and still to an extent suffer from. But no person is more inherently prone to addiction.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_dependence

 

Can I ask why you think video games in particular are dangerous, as opposed to other forms of addiction? Unless that post was a joke that went over my head.

 

Because games are extremely accessible, free, enjoyable, commonplace and seemingly completely harmless. There is nothing about games that is inherently more addicting -- it's the abundance and the mindset surrounding them.

 

I actually did an oral presentation earlier this week about procrastination and the toll it takes on life. I talked about my personal experience, the detrimental effects of procrastination, and how you can eventually overcome it. After a brief explanation of what procrastination is, I told them to raise their hands if they were a procrastinator and guess what? The entire auditorium consisting of 300 people had all raised their hands. You don't realize you're a procrastinator until you really step back and look at your performance at school, at work and at home. You feel lazy, you tend to skip school, you do your homework at the very last minute. These are negative effects at the result of your procrastinating behavior. Once you enter the cycle it takes a lot to break the chain. Improved time management and priority listing is key to resolving this exhibited behavior. You have to accommodate your needs before your wants. It's hard because procrastination isn't temporary. It is also likely to cause stress and impede on your happiness as you often find yourself questioning where you are in life because you feel regret as a result of your procrastination. I left the audience with a scenario, You have an assignment due the next day and there's 20 questions. You have finished the first question and you feel accomplished, you pat yourself on the back and give yourself a 3 hour break before completing the next question. A lot of the students smiled and laugh but I know it relates to them because quite a few came to me and talked to me. This is how you know you're a heavy procrastinator.

 

If anyone wants a book recommendation for breaking the chain: Eat That Frog really helped me. It's more about success in business but it is applicable to normal procrastination.

Actually, there's no point in reading the whole book. I'll give a TL;DR:

• Make lists. The more time you spend making lists and prioritizing, the less time you will need to spend working
• Prioritize what is the biggest, hardest thing that you will need to do in the day, and do it first
• Don't overestimate how many hours are in a day

 

I broke my addiction to gaming by making another addiction... to my To-Do lists. I get a mental high every time I cross something off the list. I have a constant list going every day, even if it's small, simple things like "do the dishes today". I try to put the most important things to me first, so something like dishes tends to be towards the middle - needs to get done, but don't put it before major life obligations like work and health. I try to remember to reward myself - including remembering to play some - in between accomplishing things. Everyone needs some leisure time, but it's not really leisure anymore when it becomes an addiction.

It's probably one of the hardest things to do, but the nice part is it's also very simple. It's not complicated, it just takes a lot of self-control and diligence.

 

I don't mean to go off-topic here, but I wanted to say procrastination isn't always a bad thing. From my personal experience in college, I've found that I perform better under time constraints. If I'm given 3 weeks for an assignment, I usually do it the few days before it's due. It allows me to sit down, stay focused, and power through it knowing that I HAVE to get it done now. If I go home and work on an assignment the day it's assigned, I'll get easily distracted and there will always be the thought that it's not due anytime soon so my mind isn't set on it. Almost everyone I know is the same way. I believe we live in a society where procrastination is normal behavior, healthy or not. I agree it puts unnecessary stress on yourself, but in turn that stress becomes motivation.

As for maple addiction, I think everyone here was addicted at one point in their life. The way maplestory is designed, it's inherently addicting. Your character is anthropomorphic, you can make facial expressions, chat with anyone via typing, dress your character, explore an entire virtual world, "grow" as you play and level up. It's easy to make it your second reality. As you grow in level, more content is available, so it makes you want to spend hours upon hours leveling up to get there. Not to mention there's an entire economy that you can participate in. Many virtual reality games are like this, such as WoW and runescape, etc. It's very easy to get so invested in these kind of games. Of course, it's not just Maplestory. Many people get addicted to console games as well, like Call of Duty, Halo, Minecraft, etc. It's video games in general. They provide a lot of pleasure and entertainment with such little effort. People say the same about television and people's addiction to that. You literally just have to sit there and the TV provides hours of entertainment and pleasure with no effort from you. Bottomline, humans are creatures of habit and we naturally get addicted to things whether we realize it or not.

 

Dang, the only way I broke out of this game was by being addicted to another game LOL. Though, I don't regret any second of this game.

 

Back then (with old maple) i was addicted too. I'm glad i was just 6 starting to play the game and so on. Because elementary gives u a lot of free time and almost no homework. I played the game 5 years and in 2011 (before big bang (in EMS)) i was on vacation and somehow MapleStory wouldn't start up. I tried countless times and eventually it removed itself. I couldn't download it anymore for a few years. My ol' laptop really saved me there.